"The human mind is like a fertile ground where seeds are continually being planted. The seeds are opinions, ideas and concepts. You plant a seed, a thought, and it grows. The word is like a seed, and the human mind is fertile, but only for those kinds of seeds it is prepared for. What is so important is to see which kind of seeds our mind is fertile for, and to prepare it to receive the seeds of love."- The Four Agreements: Don Miguel Ruiz.
When we hear an opinion and believe it, it becomes part of our belief system. The words we use are so powerful. The words we heard as children we accepted as gospel, we believed what was said about us especially if repeated. The seeds grew and grew and we then believed these words to be truth. The words we use when we speak about ourselves do the same thing.
Have you ever done something a little bit silly and said "I'm such an idiot, I always do that". Why did you speak that way about yourself? Counselling can help explore the words you use to describe yourself and look at where the roots of these seeds started.
Equally the words we use about others are infectious. Ever noticed what happens in an environment in which gossiping is a regular occurrence? The atmosphere changes, you start to feel more negative, disgruntled, disappointed.
The good news is positive words are just as infectious! When you start to speak positively and kindly about yourself it allows you to accept positive things and love from others. It can be so hard to break the cycle of negative self talk and to break against a culture in which gossiping is the norm. Practice, practice, practice- it gets easier I promise and the benefits are incredible.